4 Tips for Giving and Receiving Feedback

Hey . what is your reaction when you hear the phrase...

"Can I give you some feedback?"

Depending on your culture, this doesn't usually mean good news is coming.

But, we all want feedback, don't we?!?

One of the reasons giving and receiving feedback can be challenging is because ... there are people involved. Most of the time, we are so caught up in our own internal turmoil ("Will they be mad at me? What if they cry?") that we either don't give the feedback at all - or do a horrible job at delivering it.

So here are a few tips to get you started:
1. Remember that the relationship is the most important thing.If you're not doing it for the good of the relationship and because you care about that person, don't do it.
2. See the human first.Assume positive intent. Ask questions about what was going on. We all have bad days and bad patterns.
3. Get "clean".How much of this feedback is about what bothers you vs. a true development need?
4. Be prepared.Think through what you'd like the outcome to be. How do you want to show up? What resources do you have to help (Emergenetics)?

If you or your team would like a refresher on how to do this well, I offer workshops where we can go deep on these tools and practice in a safe space.

No More "Oreo" or "Sandwich" Feedback!

You might have been trained to give the good-bad-good approach, but it doesn't work! We don't hear the good, we only anticipate the bad!

One of the best things to keep in mind when giving feedback is what Brene Brown says, "Clear is Kind. Unclear is Unkind." Be clear and see the human first!